Alizah Salario

In just a few weeks, Jersey Shore has become the new Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Snooki is a household name and fist pumps are the new dance floor craze. Perhaps this inconsequential scrap of pop culture doesn’t deserve my attention, but to be quite honest, the show has sucked me in – twice. I think I’ve got a ‘situation.’ (See Mike and his 6-pack – now I know you want to watch the show to get the inside joke)

We all know that Shore, just like The Hills, Laguna Beach and all sleazy reality television, is edited and remixed until the truth is unrecognizable. Each character is whittled down to a vapid, stereotypical version of his or her true self.  Perhaps I’m giving ‘The Situation’ and J-wow too much credit, but I refuse to believe anyone is as simple as GTL (gym, tanning and laundry).

I’ll let the show speak for itself. A few choice quotes from yesterday’s episode:

“These girls aren’t hoes. It may take, like, a couple of times of hanging out before they’ll get naked and get  in the hot tub.”

“Its all about your numbers. If you call enough girls, you’re bound to hit it.”

“If I’m feeling the beat, I just may feel moved to move my fist up and down in a pumping motion.”

I’m not worried about our culture becoming vapid and superficial. It already is. Truth be told, I see nothing wrong with a little brain candy now and then. (One can enjoy both the New Yorker and The New York Post). I’m worried about ‘everyday’ people who opt to become their media-created persona – fantasy becomes their reality, the character more potent than the individual. The JS crew is perhaps the most ‘real’ of reality t.v.’s hit shows, and that is exactly why it will have an insidious effect on viewers. But what happens to those of us who aren’t reality stars, but think they should be? Every single one of us now has the ability to create our own ‘celeb’ persona via Twitter, Facebook, etc. I’m concerned because I see a narrow, reductive version of myself emerging through social media – and I’m told this is a good thing.

Its not that I think value lies in my superficial traits, but I most certainly feel the pressure to capitalize on them. Truth be told, I’ve heard time and time again that I must ‘brand’ myself in order to find some kind of niche as a writer. So folks, what should it be? Cute cub reporter looking for the next scoop a la Lois Lane? Intellectual yet fashionable single girl in the city a la Carie Bradshaw? Arts afficionado? Lonely introverted writer? Should I put a flower or a glamorous photo on my website as a defining trait? The list of potential identities is endless, yet none stand alone. By definition, branding is reductive. Out of context, my ‘characters’ are unfit and untrue. I know this, yet I feel the need to create a public persona before I’ve even rubbed shoulders with success and fame.

I do not think this is crisis of morality or character. It is a loss imagination and the ability to believe in bigger things. Hook ups and bling itit is. There is no mystery left and perhaps no room for fantasy.  I’m still searching for a brand – one that is authentic and undeniably me. In this media climate, I’m not sure how marketable ‘authentic’ is. Sigh. Maybe I should just change my name to Skooki.

Update #1:

Just as I was regretting this seemingly vapid and unimportant post, The New Yorker comes out with their Jersey Shore critique. A must-read.

Oh, and Gawker has some fancy-looking Jersey Shore graph too.